Turns out there is actually a perfect woman out there

GQ - "I love a good dick joke. Fart jokes. Poop jokes. They're hilarious. They never get old. But especially not a dick joke."

Well if that quote is not the icing on the cake/cherry on top/another obscure dessert reference, I just don't know what is. I already thought Mila was the second most-perfect woman in the world (behind Rachel Jansen, her character in Forgetting Sarah Marshall, duh), but I think this pretty much vaults her up to number one and it's not even close.

I mean dick jokes, fart jokes, poop jokes....umm welcome to 219% of my conversations with Special Ed. Really, ask PrincesSA. Though I'm pretty sure she thinks they do get old. Which is why she is clearly not the most perfect woman in the world, but that's another story for another day. Anyway, if we aren't making jokes about dicks, farts or poop then we most certainly are not talking. She literally could not have made three more perfect choices of the types of jokes she likes.

I don't think I need to spend much time on how perfect her appearance is. I mean look at her. Fully clothed and I'm fully erect. Plus, she has a lip bite to DIE FOR.

Mila, if I had a nickel for every time someone told me back in the day that I looked like Macaulay Culkin in Home Alone, I would be richer than Mark Zuckerburg and Bill Gates combined. So I vote you kick his sorry ass to the curb and come check out/christen the new black couch we just got in our apartment. It's plush leather!!