Why on God's green earth are there so many VW Bugs in Washington DC??

So I took a little trip down to Washington DC this weekend to drink some beers and see the Celtics beat the Wizards. Only one of those things happened, and it had nothing to do with the Celts. HOWEVER, what I did see was absolutely more impressive than that phallic Washington Monument or giant statue of honest Abe. What was it, you ask? Oh just approximately 9000 VW Bugs rolling through town. Okay clearly not but I swear to god it was at least over 30. Blue ones, white ones, black ones, convertibles, you name it and it was there. Just insanity.

I was there for about 40 hours. So by some simple math just there we have a ratio of almost 1 VW Bug per 1 hour I was there. But then you have to think of the hours I slept each night (roughly 3 am - noon both nights) plus all the time I was inside (buddy's apt, bar, Celts game) to realize that in the amount of time it was humanly possible for me to see one - let's call it 4 hours (definitely a high estimate) - that ratio isn't even close. Just gonna take a conservative guesstimate of 28 cars seen. Do you realize what that means? 7 fucking VW Bugs per hour! Just preposterous. There truly is no upper limit on my guess for this ratio had I been outside the whole time.

So, two thoughts:

1. There has to be some explanation for this and I will not rest until I know what it is. Do government workers get some sort of crazy deal on them? Is there something about them that makes them handle the DC terrain better than others? Is it the gas mileage? Do they make it easier to spy? Is everyone that drives one a German embassy employee and they get them for free? I need answers now.

2. Special Ed decided to bring back the whole Punch Bug game about a year or two ago now. Thought he was really something else with it there for a while, too. Well let me tell you something. I am like Jordan in his prime right now with the Punch Bug game. Like Bobby Fischer on the chess table, Beethoven on the piano and Ali in the ring, all rolled into one. There is NO stopping me. I literally can't even remember the last time someone got me. Special Ed even admitted today that it's been a long time since he got me with one. Uhh yeah dude I guess it's been a "long time" ...ha just kidding, that doesn't even do it justice. I think I can pretty much just do it with my eyes closed at this point. Took a trip up to Boston with our boy RobbieMo and literally beat him 13-0. Thirteen to fucking zero bro, really? Not even gonna put up a fight? Plus half the trip was in the dark, probably woulda been at least a 20 spot had it been all daylight. I was honestly considering just trying to punch myself by the end of it because it would've made the game more challenging.

So I bring this up because if I were Special Ed or RobbieMo, I'd be thanking my fucking lucky stars that I didn't go on this trip with me. I'm not even joking 0.001% when I say I think I might've just shattered one of their Humerus bones into a million pieces. Woulda been running for cover and shit the whole time, callin they mamas and telling them about that big bad man with the head on a swivel and a good eye for a weird lookin car.

Now, if only I could get the colors right...